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Questions to bring with you
In the room, an overwhelmed family nods at words they don't understand. The most useful thing you can carry is the question you didn't know to ask. Below is a checklist for each person you're likely to talk to: the discharge planner, your Area Agency on Aging, the Medicaid office, an attorney, a care home on a tour. Print the one you need, or text it to yourself, and walk in prepared, not lost.
To print or save just one list: open its section, then use your browser's Print (Ctrl + P on Windows, ⌘ + P on Mac) — the page is built to print as a clean checklist, without the menus. You can also print the whole page at once.
Jump to a checklist
If a hospital discharge is coming
Use this now if a discharge is coming or there has been a sudden turn for the worse. Who to ask: the hospital's discharge planner or case manager. Ask to speak with them today.
Medicare has its own checklist for leaving the hospital. Do these four things from it before anything else. Write down the names and phone numbers of people to call with questions. Write out the full list of prescription drugs, over-the-counter drugs, vitamins and supplements, and ask which to keep taking after leaving. Ask what problems to watch for and what to do about them. And ask if any equipment, such as a walker, is needed, if Medicare covers it, and who sets up delivery. Ask for written discharge instructions and a summary of the person's current health to take to the follow-up visit.[1] If you are the caregiver, Medicare also says to make sure you can really give the help the person needs, and to get the name and number of someone you can call.[1]
- Is my person going home, to rehab, or to a nursing home? Why that one?
- What care will they need in the first days, and who is expected to give it?
- Does Medicare cover a short skilled-nursing or rehab stay? For how long?
- What equipment, medicines, and follow-up visits do we leave with?
- If home isn't safe yet, can the discharge wait until a safe plan is in place?
- Who do I call, day or night, if things go wrong after we get home?
Before you call your Area Agency on Aging / options counselor
Free local help finding services, through the federal Eldercare Locator's network.[3] Who to ask: your Area Agency on Aging. Reach any of them at the Eldercare Locator, 1-800-677-1116. Ask what the local agency itself can offer and what the rules are for who qualifies, because that changes from county to county.
- Given my person's situation, what services do we qualify for right now?
- What can help us keep them at home safely, and what would it cost?
- Is there help for me as the caregiver, such as a break (respite), support, or training?
- Which local agencies, programs, or benefits am I probably missing?
- What should I be doing now to get ready for the next stage?
- Who else should I be talking to? Can you connect me?
For free Medicare counseling (SHIP)
Free one-on-one Medicare counselling, not a sales line. Who to ask: your State Health Insurance Assistance Program (SHIP), at shiphelp.org.
- What does my person's current Medicare coverage actually include?
- What will Medicare cover for skilled nursing or rehab after a hospital stay — and what won't it?
- Would a different plan or supplement fit their situation better, and when can we change it?
- How do we handle a denied claim or a bill that looks wrong?
- How do Medicare and Medicaid work together if we end up needing both?
For the state Medicaid office / ADRC — including the “$20k” question
This is where long-term-care Medicaid, the limits, and the waivers are handled. Who to ask: your state Medicaid office or Aging & Disability Resource Center (ADRC).
- What are the income and savings limits right now for long-term-care Medicaid in my state?
- What does the application ask for, and how long does it usually take?
- If I have very little to my name, who chooses the nursing home? What are those homes like?
- Which local homes take Medicaid, and are Medicaid beds open now?
- If my parent is married, how is the spouse still at home protected?
- Does my state's Medicaid pay for care at home or in assisted living, not just a nursing home?
- Is there a waiting list for the at-home care program (the home- and community-based waiver)? How long?
For an elder-law attorney (the money, the house, the timing)
The right place for "how do we do this legally?" questions. Who to ask: a licensed elder-law attorney in your state. Your Area Agency on Aging or SHIP can often point you to one.
- Given our money situation, what are our legal choices before we spend or move anything?
- Which of the things we own count toward Medicaid, and which do not?
- We gave something away in the last five years. Does the look-back affect us?
- How do we protect the spouse at home, and the house, the right way?
- What is the state likely to collect after death (estate recovery)? Can we plan for it?
- What will your help cost, and what should we do first?
For a Veterans Service Officer (VSO) — free help with a claim
VA says VSOs it recognizes "always provide their services on benefit claims free of charge". Be exact about the rest, though. VA-accredited attorneys and claims agents may charge a fee for representing you in an appeal or a request for another review.[2] So "accredited" does not mean "free." Ask which one you are speaking to, and ask about fees in writing before you sign anything. Who to ask: a Veterans Service Officer through your county veterans office or an accredited VSO organization.
- Based on their service, does my person (or a surviving spouse) qualify for the Aid & Attendance pension?
- What is this year's limit on what a person can own (the net-worth limit)? How is our situation counted?
- What VA programs for care at home or changes to the home are offered near us?
- How do VA benefits work together with Medicare, TRICARE For Life, and Medicaid?
- What papers do you need from us, and how long does a decision take?
Before hiring in-home care or a home-care agency
For keeping someone at home safely. Who to ask: the home-care agency (and your AAA about what's covered).
- Are your caregivers your employees — screened, bonded, and insured — or independent contractors?
- What exactly will a caregiver do, and what won't they do (bathing, medications, cooking, driving)?
- How do you handle a missed shift, a last-minute cancellation, or a bad match?
- What is the hourly cost, the minimum hours, and what raises the price?
- Can any of this be paid by a Medicaid waiver, VA benefits, or long-term-care insurance?
- Who supervises the caregiver, and how do you keep me informed?
When touring an assisted living community or personal care home
Bring these on the tour and write down the answers. Who to ask: the administrator or admissions director — and check the facility's public record in our directory first.
- What exactly is included in the monthly price, and what costs extra?
- How is staffing at night and on weekends, and what is the caregiver-to-resident ratio?
- Does my person get their own room, and can they eat in their room or only in a dining hall?
- Are the doctors, pharmacy, and hospital they use nearby — and how far?
- What transportation do you provide to and from medical appointments?
- What happens to their car, and can residents keep and use a vehicle?
- How do you handle a medical emergency, and a change in needs over time?
- May I see your most recent state inspection report?
When touring or choosing a nursing home
Start from the home's public safety record. Who to ask: the admissions director and, if you can, the director of nursing.
- What was your most recent state inspection result? Were any problems fixed?
- How many nurses and aides are on duty, especially nights and weekends?
- Do you take Medicaid? Could my person stay if they move onto Medicaid later?
- How near are the hospital and their doctors? How do residents get to appointments?
- Can my person have their own room? How do you handle personal belongings and privacy?
- How do you let families know when something changes?
- What would cause you to discharge or move a resident?
When looking at a memory-care setting
For when memory loss and safety are the main worry. Who to ask: the memory-care director or administrator.
- How is the unit kept secure so residents don't wander off? How are the exits handled?
- How many staff are there for each resident on the memory-care unit? How are staff trained in dementia care?
- How do you handle upset or late-day confusion (often called "sundowning") without leaning too much on medicine?
- What does a normal day look like? How do you keep residents busy and calm?
- How do you keep families informed as the condition changes?
- What happens if my person's needs grow past what this unit can handle?
Free local help, and on your side. You do not have to figure this out alone. Your Area Agency on Aging will talk through your choices with you for free. Find yours through the federal Eldercare Locator at 1-800-677-1116 or eldercare.acl.gov (run by the Administration for Community Living). To learn about the four kinds of local helpers and what each one does, see Who helps me locally.
Sources and what they support
Sources checked 2026-09-23 using AI-assisted editorial research. The lists on this page are questions to ask the people who decide the answers, not answers themselves.
- Medicare, Your Discharge Planning Checklist (publication 11376). Supports each item attributed to it: writing down names and phone numbers of people to call, writing out the full drug list including over-the-counter medicines, vitamins and supplements and asking which to continue, asking about complications to watch for, asking whether equipment is needed and whether Medicare covers it and who delivers it, asking for written discharge instructions and a summary of current health status, and the caregiver items about being able to give the help needed and having someone to call. It is a preparation aid. It does not promise that a discharge can be delayed, does not establish a right to remain in hospital, and does not say Medicare will cover any particular service — those depend on the person's coverage and the facility.
- VA, getting help filing a claim or appeal (fact sheet). Supports that accredited attorneys, claims agents and Veterans Service Organizations can all help file a claim or appeal; the quoted statement that VA-recognized VSOs always provide their services on benefit claims free of charge; and that VA-accredited attorneys and agents may charge a fee for representation in appealing or requesting additional review of a rating decision. Accreditation is not the same as being free, and this fact sheet does not set what any individual representative charges.
- Administration for Community Living, Eldercare Locator. Supports that the Eldercare Locator is a federal service connecting families to local aging services, staffed and reachable on 1-800-677-1116. Its staff connect people to local services; they do not determine clinical, legal or Medicaid eligibility, and what a given Area Agency on Aging can provide varies by county — which is why the description of it as an "unbiased hub" has been softened on this page.
Corrected in this pass: the Veterans section said never to pay for help because "accredited help is free", which is wrong as stated — VSOs are free, while accredited attorneys and claims agents may charge. The Area Agency on Aging and SHIP descriptions no longer call them "unbiased". Everything else on this page is deliberately a question rather than an answer: facility staffing, discharge rights, Medicaid limits and memory-care standards are set by state, payer and facility, and belong to the people you are asking.